I observed an interesting interaction between my daughter and some other children at the playground last week. My daughter, who is five years old, tried to join in on a game of tag some other kids were playing. One of them asked her, “How old are you?” She proudly told them, “I’m 5!” The same kid replied, “Oh, we’re eight. We can’t play with you,” and walked away. 

My daughter was a little hurt and a lot confused. While she only started school this year, she is the 6th in line of my homeschooled children, and most of her social interactions have been with other homeschooled kids. The thing about students in a homeschool community is that age is never a barrier to friendship. You have probably experienced this if you’ve been a part of the homeschool community for a while. At a homeschool park day or field trip, it’s not uncommon to see a teenager playing tag with a toddler, an older child helping a younger one read a sign or do an experiment, or a group of kids of all ages discussing their favorite graphic novel.  

In a brick-and-mortar school, students are constantly grouped by age, not only in their classes but also where they sit at lunch, when and where they take their breaks, field trips, and extracurricular activities. While watching the incident with my daughter, I remembered times when I was warned away from the older students on the playground. As I got older, it became a badge of honor to be one of those older students who was WAY too cool to play with the little kids. No wonder it seemed so odd to these 8-year-olds that my daughter assumed she could join in their game!

If you’re just joining the homeschool world, you may be inclined to *only* seek out playtimes, meet-ups, and learning opportunities with students of a similar age to yours. We’ve been taught by society our whole lives to keep up with those age barriers. While there are times and occasions when those groupings can be beneficial, I encourage you to broaden your student’s horizons when making new friends. Older students can benefit from helping and encouraging younger students and teaching them new skills. Interacting with younger students also gives older students, who often feel pressure to be “cool,” permission to let their imaginative and silly personalities out for a while. Younger children can gain confidence and social skills by spending time with older students. Friends are there to offer a push on the swing or a hand with a craft project. They may pick a new interest or hobby from an older child that they would have never discovered on their own!

Embracing multi-age friend groups can also be great for you as a learning coach. It’s easier to find other parents to meet up with when a specific age range doesn’t limit us. Parents with older children and homeschool veterans are often eager to share knowledge and tips with new homeschoolers who have children younger than their own. It can be encouraging as the parent of a younger student to see successfully homeschooled teenagers. You may even find a babysitter or two in an older student!

The gift of diversity- a group of friends of different ages, abilities, backgrounds, and interests- is a great benefit of homeschooling. Take some time this month to embrace the vibrant homeschool community you became a part of when you joined Sequoia Grove Charter Alliance!